Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Hubby, More Help on the Weekends Please!

I know that since mid-pregnancy, dear hubby has worked and I have not.  During my pregnancy and for a time after the births, he took care of most of the household chores.  Currently, he works all day, comes home tired, and does much of the cooking.  I deeply and truly appreciate all he has done to allow me to be at home with my boys and to take care of us. 

THAT SAID, I would appreciate a little help on the weekends.  During the week, Hubby often comes home and naps, then gets on the computer and/or the phone.  I take care of the evening feeding by myself, as I do all the daytime feedings.  He and I both play with the boys until I get them ready for bed.  This is a good system, although I am exhausted by the time they are both in their cribs.  I also gladly take care of any midnight wakings, and let the dog out when he invariably starts to cry at three a.m.

On the weekend, however, this pattern continues.  Hubby takes care of his family drama, spends time on the computer, and works on whatever project has entered his mind (such as perfecting an oatmeal cookie recipe or looking up information on used cars for the umpteenth time.)  As every one of the boys' meal times approach, he is busy with something so I do most of the meals myself.  This weekend, for example, my folks came to watch the boys while we went car shopping.  Hardly a relaxing experience.  On Sunday, hubby did one feeding with me.  All the other feedings, however, were handled entirely by me.  My weekends, therefore are much like my weeks.  Every 3 to 3 1/2 hours I make bottles, every other time making cereal or dishing out pureed veggies as well.  I change diapers, entertain boys and rock them to sleep when they get cranky.  When they are both crying, sometimes hubby will take one, but often he is on the phone leaving me to do my best to soothe them both.  I also continue to get up in the middle of the night as required, and I get up a half hour before we expect the boys to wake so I can get bottles ready to go and be awake to get the boys up before hubby wakes.

I NEED A BREAK!   I love these guys and I love staying home with them, but would it kill hubby to take them one weekend morning a month?  Even if he does not feed them, at least get the bottles ready, wake the boys and bring them to me?  Can't he make bottles or mix cereal, or take one guy for feedings to give me the one-on-one time I crave with each of the guys?  I often hear "I'll feed you if you feed them."  He then makes an elaborate meal for us, which is nice, but I'd rather have a PB&J, and get a little relief from mommy duties. 

I don't mean to be ungrateful.  He takes care of a lot of things, freeing me to be with the guys.  I just wish sometimes he'd be with the guys to free me for other things.  I know I'd get push back if I mentioned this.  He does, as I said, work, which I don't.  He also takes care of most of OUR meals and is finding us a car so that's one less thing I worry about.  Still.  Jeez.  I'm pooped!


  1. You do need a break, honey! I feel much better if I get a break in my everyday routine on the weekends. It's like when we were working full-time....the weekend was a time to get some rest and get ready for the next week. I totally get it!! Hope he does too!

  2. Thanks! Of course there's no such thing as a break from being a mommy, but a little relief from the routine would be just what the dr ordered.